The things they say

Student:  Global warming has been recognized by one of our more recent presidents, Al Gore.
Me:   

Student:   The organization 350.org [a global initiative to bring awareness to global warming] is easy for us to remember because there are 350 days in a year.
Me:  <slaps forehead>

Student:  Which internet do I need to use for this course?
Me: 

I mean...

C'mon.

There's been a bevy of words coming out of my students' mouths that are less than brilliant.

Meanwhile, I spent the day piddling around my grandmother's house, just her and me.  I drove down to spend the day with her last year, and that seemed to go well enough (what with braving the Saturday afternoon crowds at the local small city shopping places).  So I downloaded some audiobooks and CDs, hooked those up to my little buggy's speakers, and took off down the road before the sun showed its perky little face.  I found my way to my favorite little well-known breakfast spot, chose what has become my regular seat "for one!" and started in on cup numero uno of coffee before the waitress said "Do you need a few minutes?"  In other words, this is one of my favorite days of the year.

Omelet with avocado, organic spinach and gouda, crusty cinnamon sourdough toast, fresh fruit.  Irish cream.  Thanks for asking.

It's good to have a few dollars in my pocket and a kid-free morning.

So eventually, the sun and I raced to my grandma's house.  Ol' Mr. Sun, Sun, Mr. Golden Sun won.  And then the weather talk began as my family get-togethers are wont to include.  Truthfully, all sorts of things came and went, and we had good chat times.

I also dropped a bag of goods on her counter.  Like contraband, the goods were secreted away faster than one would think that a nearly 90-year old woman could stash them in her freezer.  See, my grandmother has a sweet tooth the size of her farm, which I learned today is over 100 acres.  So I like to bring her some individually-wrapped treats that she can freeze and take out whenever the fancy strikes.  (I'm guessing this is fairly frequently.  I come by my predilection for sugar honestly, it seems.)

Folks.  I brought her some blondies, muffins, cinnamon rolls, and soup.  And no sooner had those items been hidden away, my grandma brought out four favorite cookie recipes and basically told me to pick two that I wanted to make for her.

This is why I was there today - to do whatever she wanted - so this wasn't unexpected.  However.  I brought her a literal bag full of treat-y things and then she was scheming how to get a few dozen more treat-y things.  And, whaddya know, that's exactly what happened.

Now, she had made two rhubarb pies this morning before I came because her church is having a potluck tomorrow.  ("Rhubarb isn't my favorite, but I tolerate it.  It's not apple!")  One was "for our lunch" and the other was to take to church.  I just couldn't do it.  I was still stuffed from breakfast and she was raring to eat before the small hand was pointing to the 11 on the clock face.  In other words, she ate a piece in the "smaller" (?) pie so has a whole bunch-o-pie also hanging out on her counter.  (She also whisked the opened bag of faux-chocolate chipsters off to the pantry before lunch.)

She has a BUNCH OF SUGAR in her kitchen.  I'm not sure what else she eats other than dessert and chili.  (She really likes chili.)

So with a couple of dozen warm oatmeal cookies spread out on the table and a baking pan full of chippy bars cooling on the stove, she offered me some rhubarb pie to take home and nothing that I had just baked.  (Why yes I did purloin 2 cookies when she wasn't looking.) 

Which obviously clears some space for the good stuff. 

The things they say.